Well, almost, there was my i-pod and the occasional car whizzing by me as I steadily climbed the hills by my house. This week I was unable to do my long run with my team in training buddies because it was my plan to get away for a bit and go to New Hampshire to visit my cousins for the long holiday weekend. So I set off on my journey to complete my long run solo. While I do enjoy the company of my running companions, there is something special about running by myself. I get to be alone in my thoughts without worrying about keeping up a conversation with a running buddy, and I get to slow down and speed up as much as I like without having to worry about affecting my running buddies. It is harder though for me to get myself motivated to get out the door by myself, but somehow I managed.
Alone in my thoughts I began to think about the commitment I made to raise money for cancer and not to mention to run the marathon in San Francisco. Negative thoughts started to creep into my head like "how are you ever going to raise this money, and you are not good enough to accomplish this goal." I was beginning to doubt myself. But then I thought of my mother and her fight with cancer, I thought of all the other people who I know who have passed away from cancer and those who are survivors, I thought about all the people that I don't even know that are fighting cancer right now and I thought about their strength and resolve. I reminded myself that I just need to take it one step at a time and that I am truly blessed to be able to have the time, health and energy to devote to such a worthy cause. By the time I reached the end of the run I forgot all about the negative thoughts, I was done with my long run and I did it in the solitude of my own thoughts, my own body and spirit and being alone with myself on my run made all of the difference, it made me stronger.
As I reflect on my run and the thoughts that went through my head I became present to what it must be like for someone who is fighting cancer and the kinds of thoughts they must have and the power of those thoughts on their recovery and whether they are going through treatment alone or do they have the love and support of family and friends. 50% of the money I raise for LLS goes specifically to supportive services for patients and family members and 25% goes to research. If you would like to make a contribution to help fight cancer please go to my webpage http://pages.teamintraining.org/nj/nikesf11/kmarciano
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