Running with Hagit

Or should I say, my friend Hagit ran with me in her heart while she completed her second Mini-10K in NYC Central Park this past Saturday. I was supposed to run with her; we ran the race together last year. That was her inaugural race only after a few weeks of training. We have done several races since then, but this one was special because it represented a year of running for her; a transformation of not only her body, but also her mind and spirit. You can tell just from looking at her post-race photos that something has changed inside her and that change has her aura illuminating. I am so proud of her, she ran this years race all by herself and she had her very first PR. I am so proud of you Hagit and I wish I could have been there with you, but you know I was in heart.

Last Sunday I was doing a ride for the cure with our dear friend Jack Lally to raise money and awareness for diabetes. The ride was so beautiful, the views were breathtaking of the old country roads and houses in Basking Ridge and Chatham, NJ. Our course was 75 miles and it was easy enough to follow the mile markers that were painted on the roads. Jack and I had a few laughs about our bike shorts asking each other if they made our butts look big and we joked about the trophy we would win at the end because we were "winning!" Only at approximately 25 minutes into the race my beautiful road bike hit an enormous pothole; it was on a sudden downhill that curved around a corner. The roads are bad this year I suppose because of the brutal winter we experienced. At the moment that my bike hit the pothole I felt myself falling, I actually had the thought "can I stop this." But I knew instantly that I could not stop myself from falling and committed myself to the fall. I flew over the handle bars and landed directly on my head while also managing to scrape my left side hip and elbow. I never lost consciousness but I also could not move anything in my body. Jack was there in an instant and he managed to roll me out of the road before I could get hit by any oncoming cars or cyclists that were behind us. He was asking me questions like what hurts the most; but initially I could not speak. All I wanted to do was go to sleep, but somehow I managed to keep my eyes open. I remembered from somewhere that you should not go to sleep after a head injury so I fought against it desperately.

Besides the pain, the first thing I felt was nauseas and the second thing I felt was cold. A man stopped his truck to make sure we were alright, we did not wait for an ambulance, he packed me in his SUV (bike and all) and took me back to the start. We did not wait for an ambulance, Jack's daughter (and my friend) Kelsey took me to the ER in Morristown right away. I was so cold that Kelsey gave me a blanket; she was sweating because it was hot out but I was cold? The ER took us in right away and Kelsey left to get things sorted out back at the start of the race, but Paul showed up soon after. I thought I broke my elbow because it hurt so badly and I could barely move it, but it turns out that was not the worst of my problems. I was brave, I thought I was OK, throughout the ordeal I did not cry once. I had a feeling something was wrong when the woman next to me got her CT results before me even though her test was done after mine. Finally the doctor came in and told me that I have a small bleed in my brain and they are going to have to admit me. He was a very nice doctor and he said I was going to be OK. The next thing I knew they were taking me to the ICU. I had a blood pressure monitor connected to my left arm, electrodes on my chest, a heart rate monitor on my finger, an IV in my right arm and compression socks on my legs. To top all of that off, they said I could not eat anything in case they needed to do a procedure if the bleed or my neurological symptoms got worse. The staff was more than wonderful with me and there was someone checking in on me every 10 minutes (or so it seemed). When I was in pain, Kelsey made sure they gave me some pain medication. A few hours later in the ICU the doctor came by to tell me that what I have is a traumatic sub-arachnoid brain hemorrhage. Several doctors came in to tell me that without my helmet I would have died instantly.

It has been a week since the ordeal and I am at home recovering. I continue to have headaches that occur spontaneously and hurt in strange places in my head. Most of all I feel very tired. I have good days and bad days. For example, Friday I slept most of the day and Saturday I slept until 11:30 and then went back to bed at 4:30pm. They say that feeling tired is a normal part of the healing process and I need to be patient with myself. However, I am still getting used to not remembering things or being able to find the right words. The other day I left the refrigerator door wide open, and I never do that.

I am just happy that I am here, enjoying another beautiful day as I look out my window and I know the healing will come in time. Oh and Jack texted me the other day to see how I was feeling and I texted back "I am Winning!"

For my mother....Violet

"I am fooling only myself when I say my mother exists now only in the photograph on my bulletin board or in the outline of my hand or in the armful of memories I still hold tight. She lives on in everything I do. Her presence influenced who I was, and her absence influences who I am. Our lives are shaped as much by those who leave us as they are by those who stay. Loss is our legacy. Insight is our gift. Memory is our guide." Hope Edelman

1. Name: Karen Marciano


2. Home town and who you live with: Three Bridges, NJ with my husband Paul
3. Where were you born: Bay Shore, Long Island (Jersey Girls are great, but Long Island girls are the coolest :)


4. What states/countries have you lived in: Long Island, NYC, and New Jersey


5. Where did you go to college (if applicable): Hofstra University (Undergraduate), Caldwell College (Graduate-Presently)


6. What was your major (if applicable): Accounting for undergrad, but now I am getting my masters in Education


7. What do you do for a living: After 12 years in business, I have decided to become a teacher and in the fall I do my student teaching.

8. How many siblings do you have: 2 Older Brothers


9. Favorite Movies: Wicker Park and  the Black Swan

10. Favorite Books: I love to read. Patricia Cornwell is one of my favorite authors.


11. Favorite Songs: Antologia by Shakira, The Scientist by Coldplay, I will always love you by the Cure, Wild Horses by Alicia Keys, I am ready for love by India Arie, and Hey There Delilah by the Plain White T's

12. Favorite Vacation Destination: Travel is in my heart completely and I have travelled all over but these places two places I have returned to many times: Spain (my dream is to live there for a few months...I love Spain) and the DR which I have already been 3 times, I also loved Hawaii and want to go back to Kauai one day!

13. Hobbies: Running, spinning, weight training, hot yoga, taking our dog for walks on the farm, talking on the phone to my friends, reading a good book, sleeping ;)

14. Favorite Drink: Water, but when I need caffeine well then Green Tea Latte, Cappuccino, Iced Cafe Mocha.


15. Favorite Food: Salad, peanut butter and jelly sandwhiches, avocados and guacamole


16. Favorite Inspirational Quote: "Faith is believing despite the evidence and then watching the evidence change." I also like, "You don't know what you don't know"

17. Why did you decide to join Team in Training? For my mom, for everyone who has battled cancer, for those who are battling with it today. In 2005 I lost my mother to cancer and I miss her every day. I saw what cancer did to her and know how much support is needed. And while I know I cannot bring her back I decided to run with team in training to make a difference in cancer patients today and in the future. Together we can achieve miracles. 
If you would like to help me raise money for cancer please go to my fundraising page.


http://pages.teamintraining.org/nj/nikesf11/kmarciano

Six Miles in Solitude

Well, almost, there was my i-pod and the occasional car whizzing by me as I steadily climbed the hills by my house. This week I was unable to do my long run with my team in training buddies because it was my plan to get away for a bit and go to New Hampshire to visit my cousins for the long holiday weekend. So I set off on my journey to complete my long run solo. While I do enjoy the company of my running companions, there is something special about running by myself. I get to be alone in my thoughts without worrying about keeping up a conversation with a running buddy, and I get to slow down and speed up as much as I like without having to worry about affecting my running buddies. It is harder though for me to get myself motivated to get out the door by myself, but somehow I managed.

Alone in my thoughts I began to think about the commitment I made to raise money for cancer and not to mention to run the marathon in San Francisco. Negative thoughts started to creep into my head like "how are you ever going to raise this money, and you are not good enough to accomplish this goal." I was beginning to doubt myself. But then I thought of my mother and her fight with cancer, I thought of all the other people who I know who have passed away from cancer and those who are survivors, I thought about all the people that I don't even know that are fighting cancer right now and I thought about their strength and resolve. I reminded myself that I just need to take it one step at a time and that I am truly blessed to be able to have the time, health and energy to devote to such a worthy cause. By the time I reached the end of the run I forgot all about the negative thoughts, I was done with my long run and I did it in the solitude of my own thoughts, my own body and spirit and being alone with myself on my run made all of the difference, it made me stronger.

 As I reflect on my run and the thoughts that went through my head I became present to what it must be like for someone who is fighting cancer and the kinds of thoughts they must have and the power of those thoughts on their recovery and whether they are going through treatment alone or do they have the love and support of family and friends. 50% of the money I raise for LLS goes specifically to supportive services for patients and family members and 25% goes to research. If you would like to make a contribution to help fight cancer please go to my webpage http://pages.teamintraining.org/nj/nikesf11/kmarciano

First Training Run, Sunday May 22, 2011

Today was my very first training run with Team In Training, an organization dedicated to the mission of curing Leukemia, Lymphoma, Hodgkin's and Non-Hodgkin's Disease by raising money and training for endurance events. On October 16, 2011 I will run 26.2 miles in San Francisco in memory of my mother, Violet Pfalzgraf.

We met in Princeton, NJ at the towpath by Washington Street; there were 5 participants, 1 coach, and 1 captain. Before we took off for our training run, Coach Les gathered us in a circle and asked us to share why we are running and participating in Team In Training. One woman shared that her father passed away from Lymphoma and she wanted to race and raise money in honor of him. Another veteran runner said that his father was diagnosed with Lymphoma recently but with only 4 chemotherapy treatments he is in complete remission. I shared that I was running in memory of my mother who passed away from cancer in 2005. I also shared about how only a year ago I developed a mysterious rash and my doctors were concerned about possible malignancy. I was lucky the doctors did not find any malignancy, but it was such a scary and challenging time and it made me want to do something. Running with Team In Training is my way of giving back and helping those in need.

After the introductions were complete we started off on our run on the Princeton Towpath. We ran 5 miles along the beautiful trail along the D&R Canal. We started off our run slowly and within a few minutes David ran up behind us. David inspired us all at the kickoff meeting when he shared his story about his life as an attorney in NYC, his success, his new marriage and his cancer diagnosis. David joined Team In Training soon after being diagnosed; sometimes his training runs were the day after chemotherapy treatment! David is not only in remission but he is vibrantly alive.

The trail was muddy and puddles seemed to engulf the entire trail in many spots. We hopped around the puddles trying to find the least muddy areas, but still I felt the muddy water seep inside my sneakers. But none of this mattered because we ran easily chatting and  talking to each other about running and our mission to help people with cancer. Sometimes we came upon a group of geese just hanging out on the trail or in the puddles. One runner joked that the geese were going to outrun us! But we picked up the pace and they moved out of our way.

Before we knew it the run was over and we were back in the parking lot giving each other high fives. Countless times I have run a five miler, but this run was different and it put a huge smile on my face as I drove my sore muscles home. This five miler was special because this was the first one with Team In Training an organization of truly amazing people taking time out there lives to help others who are in need.

Maybe cancer has touched your life in some way, maybe you are inspired by my story, or maybe you would just like to be a part of the journey to make a difference in someones life, to be a contribution. If you are interested in donating please checkout my webpage http://pages.teamintraining.org/nj/nikesf11/kmarciano

Thank you for sharing in my journey!